Tried something new today. I decided that I would not answer my cell phone at all. I must have a lot of voicemails. Its nothing against anyone that was trying to call me but I just wanted to not deal with the thing shit storm I have created. Quite possibly the lowest of the low hit last night. and I went to go hold my favorite dog in the whole wide world. She is now 77 by dog years. Her once golden fur has turned platinum white.... She can still beg like a puppy, and I see the unconditional love in her eyes when I scratch her tummy. How can anyone own a cat? Cats are useless creatures. Cats throw up and use a litter box. YUK. Back to Daizee, the wunder slut. a little scratch behind the ears and she would melt. 1993 was much simpler time. I sat at a coffee house tonight for the first time in years. I dont count the house simply for the shear fact that the house was nothing more than a wannabe coffee establishment, desparate to be avante gard... trying to too hard to be unique. I found myself challenged to get to this place, I went with a very good, old friend that was child free for the night, and we got a good buzz on like we used to so many years ago. I often wonder why my friends put up with my bullshit. Yes thats right put up with my bullshit. I got a lecture tonight that I should forgive something from a relative and welcome them back into my life, This upset me because there is nothing to forgive. I took a stance and decided to follow it through. It was a much simpler to let bygones be bygones, when I made the decision to cut myself out but when I was the one cut out, its hard to force yourself back into this persons life. A low blood sugar momement lead to me walking away to watch goonies. It was fun to watch teenagers discuss political topics with such vigor as if they had the world by the ass. I declared at the top of my lungs that I wanted my 20's back. I want to have the materials I have now and get a do-over. I think that is fair. I know I would change ALOT of my past. I was going to post some lyrics to another song, kinda as a homeage to the little meglomaniac in tremont, since he has so often done before me. So here goes. I never listend to this song until I had the album for almost a year. I am a sucker for anyone tht is brave enough to add a string quartet to any pop piece. but here goes.... before that though, I have a comment, A breve is NOT made with coffee its made with expresso.

I wished I was smarter
I wished I was stronger
I wished I loved Jesus
The way my wife does
I wish it had been easier
Instead of any longer
I wished I could have stood where you would have been proud
But that won't happen now
That won't happen now


There's a whole lot of singing that's never gonna be heard
Disappearing everyday without so much as a word somehow
Think I broke the wings off that little song bird
She's never gonna fly to the top of the world right now
Top of the world


I don't have to answer any of these questions
Don't have no God to teach me no lessons
I come home in the evening
Sit in my chair
One night they called me for supper
But I never got up
I stayed right there in my chair


There's a whole lot of singing that's never gonna be heard
Disappearing everyday without so much as a word somehow
Think I broke the wings off that little song bird
She's never gonna fly to the top of the world right now


I wished I'd a known you
Wished I'd a shown you
All of the things I was on the inside
I'd pretend to be sleeping
When you come in in the morning
To whisper good-bye
Go to work in the rain
I don't know why
Don't know why


Cause everyone's singing
We just wanna be heard
Disappearing everyday without so much as a word somehow
Wanna grab a hold of that little song bird
Take her for a ride to the top of the world right now


(Instrumental)


Whoa, Whoa
To the top of the world
To the top of the world
To the top of the world
To the top of the world
To the top of the world
To the top of the world
To the top of the world
To the top of the world...

I often think of starting the countdown to the end, I wonder, btw the official defintion of what a cafe breve is:
Brevé: Short for Espresso Brevé. Espresso with half-n-half instead of milk.

strange to think that halfnhalf has less carbs than milk... YIKES.

blah blah, smokey, oracle all know something is up, apple too. I avoid the microscope they offer in search of solace with lunatree girl.